Sasha Is a Monster

Totally recommended, unless you’re partial to eating things that don’t taste disgusting.

Today was the nationwide protest against the passage of Prop 8 in California. I volunteered to help out at the Seattle event, so Leopold and I arrived at Volunteer Park in Capitol Hill at 9:30 am. It is the earliest either of us has been up in years. Ask anyone who knows me — it takes a lot to get me out of bed before 10 am. I called my mom this morning, because my Internet was down and I needed her to get some info for me out of my email, and her first reaction was “What are you doing up?” It was 9:15 am.

It was also, incidentally, the most gorgeous day we’ve had in Seattle in a really, really long time. It was clear and sunny and not too chilly. Commented one fellow protester: “If you want to talk about God’s will, look what a perfect day he gave us for our protest. These right-wing nut-jobs need to take a hint.”

Volunteer Park is relatively large. When I pulled into the parking lot, it wasn’t initially clear to me where we were meeting or where I was supposed to be. I was a tad bit concerned. Then I opened the door to my car and heard the sweet, sweet sounds of club music pulsing through the early-morning air. “Ah,” I said to myself. “I know where the gays are now.”

Leo and I helped make protest signs for a couple of hours while we waited for the rally to start at noon (well, I made the protest signs, then Leo chewed on them). The gays had the club mix of Lindsay Lohan’s new track, “Bossy,” which hasn’t even been formally released yet. So impressive. I made a ton of friends at the sign-making booth. Everyone was in such a great mood and everyone wanted to do anything they could do help out. Leo was a hit, too, per usual.

Trisha and Jesse showed up with their Great Dane, Bruter, and Leo immediately proceeded to get totally gay with him. Leo’s idea of showing affection to Bruter is to hop and sniff and lick around his ass and crotch. Trish and I have to support gay rights; our sons are total homos.

By the time the speakers started in Volunteer Park, the place was packed. I couldn’t even see where the group of people ended, because I was up front by the stage. I had so much fun checking out everyone’s signs — people got so creative! I was also thrilled to see so many families with their kids show up. Several state senators and religious leaders spoke, and then the mayor of Seattle spoke and declared November 15 to be Marriage Equality Day in Seattle. Woot woot! That got the crowd really pumped.

After the speakers, we started our march to the Westlake Center downtown. Trish and Jesse and I met up with Laremy, Laura, Garrett and John (and John’s puppy, Astrix). Ironically, another friend was supposed to be there, too, but he and his partner — who have been waiting four years to adopt a child — just got the call three weeks ago that they had a baby! The little kiddo had the sniffles this morning so they decided to stay in. But this couple was some of the first new people I met when I moved to Seattle. At the time, I was seriously considering adoption, and they had been involved in the process for so long that they had a ton of useful information for me, were all too happy to share it, and they were so excited and prepared for the baby they were hoping they could raise. So I was just thrilled when Laremy and Laura told me they finally got the baby. They are going to be such phenomenal dads, and that’s one lucky kiddo. It was a cool little extra thing to celebrate that day.

First we marched through neighborhoods and downtown of Capitol Hill, where people brought their families and their signs out and lined the streets to support us. We made up tons of different chants — Trish and I even started one! We were so proud of ourselves! We popped our protest-chant cherry! There were a couple of little kids leading the chants for awhile, too, which was so cool. The entire march was about two and a half miles. By the time we approached downtown there were even more marchers — it was packed. Leo finally got overwhelmed and I had to carry him. People came out of the shops and the garages and the salons and the restaurants to watch us and cheer us on. People cheered from their balconies. There were so few haters there. What I noticed, though, is that the people who were protesting the protest — the people who are opposed to equal marriage rights — were so glum and serious. They just looked angry and unhappy. And we were having so much fun! It was totally peaceful — a movement for love and tolerance. People were dancing and singing and laughing and hugging. And these religious right-wingers? Were just sad. And so very, very painfully outnumbered. I kind of felt bad for them more than anything else. It must be so burdensome to carry around that fear and hatred, to feel so separate from humanity.

Anyway, downtown was so packed that we couldn’t hear any of the speakers at the rally there. After standing around and cheering for awhile, we decided it was time to get food. I hadn’t eaten since 9 am! I’d brought a muffin but ended up feeding most of it to Leo, since he got tired and hungry. Thankfully, Laremy had parked downtown, so he and Laura drove me to my car, and then we all met up at some chili place in Ballard, where I had … a veggie burger. By the time I got home, it was around 5pm, and I was beyond tired. I curled up in bed and didn’t wake up until after 10pm.

All in all, it was an amazing day, an incredible experience to be a part of, and I’m so grateful I had the opportunity to fight for something I so strongly believe in.

You know, I do absolutely fine … until I have free time. The minute my mind is unoccupied with external tasks, it returns to its default setting of being mean to me. It’s phenomenal. The change happens so fast.

See?

This is why I need to have children.

So, I started my period today.

Don’t worry, I’ve already alerted everyone who subscribes to the mailing list (sasha_pregnancy_status@groups.yahoo.com).

Here’s the point: I realized that I’ve had no symptoms of PMS this week. I haven’t craved chocolate. I haven’t snapped at total strangers. I haven’t felt on-edge or angry or gross or bloated or anything. In fact, I’ve been in a really fucking good mood all week.

I do remember reading that a vegan diet was known to moderate the symptoms of PMS, but I guess I didn’t really believe it. But I’ve had no emotional symptoms of PMS at all. And only minor cramping, no worse than usual. Dude. This diet rocks.

and i’m the biggest flirt /
right now i’m solo /
but that will be changing eventually /
i laugh more than i cry /
you piss me off, goodbye /
got bruises on my heart and /
sometimes I get dark /
if you want my autobiography /
baby, just ask me”

Ashlee Simpson, “Autobiography”

You know, some people stalk their ex-boyfriends on Facebook. I know that’s not healthy, and so I don’t do it. Instead, I stalk girls who were, like, three years behind me in high school, just to make sure they’re still not prettier than me.

I should teach a class on self-esteem.