I don’t know that I was daring so much as terrified. But here’s the video I promised I’d post of me taking on the trapeze last week at Twestival. I wasn’t scared at all while I was at the bottom of the ladder, and I wasn’t scared at all when I was in the air. Everything in between was pure adrenaline, and I don’t respond well to pure adrenaline. I’m not the kind of person who gets a high off it. I just want it out of my body immediately. I’m glad I did it, but I don’t have any need to do it again.
My mom’s in town this week. She leaves tomorrow night. Between the insanity of launching Digri, the weekend trip to Portland, and now having my mom in town, I haven’t had any sort of a normal schedule for over two weeks now. It’s grating on me. I need my schedule back and I need my alone time back. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen anytime soon. Life is still absolute madness. I need to buckle down and make sure I create time for my personal needs in between everyone else’s needs. If I don’t take care of myself, I’m no use to anyone anyway.
I guess that trapeze is a metaphor of sorts. You jump and you hold on tight, and life moves you, up and down and back and forth, sometimes faster, sometimes slower, and you can struggle, you can kick and thrust against it here and there to make tiny changes in your velocity, but in the end, as long as you hold on to that bar, you’re going to end up wherever it takes you, and it’s going to take about as long as it’s going to take to get there.
